My mom was obviously very supportive because she spent months recording those tapes, and so have my sisters been supportive. We’ve had a few laughs and gentle arguments because we each have different take-aways from some events; but since I’m writing this book, my remembrances are the ones that count. I joked with them that they can always write their own book.

Hard.  It is hard for me to write. I am a perfectionist. Nothing is ever good enough. Should I use this word or that? Spending too much time on a lesser point and missing a bigger flaw. Questioning my decisions. Is it any good? And the list goes on. Part of the work of writing for me has been to quiet those voices in my head and just do my job. My readers are the judges as to the book’s merits. And my focus is on how proud I am to have accomplished a dream I have held in my heart for decades.

I have no rituals that I’m aware of. As crazy as it may seem, my best places to write are at the library or at my office. I do nothing at home. In my house everything distracts me so I have to go to an outside place.

I kept being amazed at how clever she was, kept her cool and made remarkable decisions under some pretty challenging circumstances. It wasn’t like she could call her Mom and ask, “Hey, I’m in the middle of a revolution and my husband’s missing, what should I do?” Perhaps what I realized most is something I knew but had never given voice to, and that is that she was also a multi-faceted person. In my life, she was always my much loved and respected Mother. But in her stories I found a more complete woman, with a proper first name, Lorraine, who was also a wife and a friend.

I think some other things I learned were about me and the ways she influenced me that I had not seen before. I can list so many gifts my mom gave me, some intended and some not so much. In the end, there is no other mother that I would like to have had than this woman who gave me life. My mom. 

The advice oft spoken by my mother, “Do as I say, not as I do.” Don’t wait like I did. There is never a perfect time for falling in love, having a baby or writing your book. Just do it. 

I hope people who read it will find it inspirational and fun, giving pause for some thought about their own wonderful mothers and the journeys we have all undertaken with our moms by our sides.

“To have a friend, you’ve got to be a friend.” 

There are so many. Perhaps, just the times we were all together. We spent so many years when one or the other member was separated from the family that the times we were all together, were very special.

Her adventurous spirit. This small town girl from Duluth, Minnesota wanted to see the world and by gosh, if she didn’t make it happen. 

Oh sure. My sister Kathy has Mom’s adventurous spirit and her diplomatic skills. Donna is the heart of the family, like Mom was. Barbara is very determined. We all love to read and travel.  Mom was very patriotic, very American, but she also taught us to appreciate the beauty in other cultures and other ways of doing things. Mom was super stubborn and unfortunately, we all have that trait to one extent or another. 

Nothing really extreme like some other family nick names I have heard. Mom wasn’t much for that stuff.  She didn’t call us sweetie, or honey, or baby. I was Pam or Pammy, Donna was DeeDee, Kathleen was Kathy and Barbara was sometimes Barb, but never Babs. She did call me the female version of Dennis the Menace, I was such a trouble maker. If she was angry with you, you knew it because she would call you by your full name, middle included! And if she was really, really mad, she would run down the list of all our names occasionally confusing me with the dog! 

I wish I knew. Looking back, I feel sad that my mom isn’t here to see it done. I’m the world’s greatest procrastinator. Then again, perhaps, I just wasn’t ready for this journey. I do know that this is a different book than the one I would have written 20 years ago. It could just be, in actuality, now is the perfect time. 

I’m fortunate, I’ve done a lot of different things. Currently I teach Entertainment Marketing courses in Hollywood at The Los Angeles Film School. I began my career in retail, becoming an apparel buyer for a major department store. Then I became a headhunter for 11 years. After that, I moved into the entertainment industry, working for Paramount Pictures and DreamWorks Animation. I loved being at Paramount. The feeling of driving onto the historic studio lot each day was such a thrill and never grew old. Paramount produced such great movies and television and I was honored to support them. When Viacom, our corporate parent, reorganized and closed our division 12+ years later, I was the Vice President of Marketing and Licensing for the Consumer Products group. 

I took some time and did some consulting and volunteer work in Africa before rejoining a studio, DreamWorks Animation. At DreamWorks, I was the head of International Retail Partnerships traveling around 11 months per year to destinations that sounded like a travel brochure - - London, Paris, Cologne, Frankfurt, Berlin, Edenborough, Madrid, Sydney, Seoul, and Hong Kong -- clocking 100,000+ airline miles each year in the process. My sisters and I saw the movie, Up in the Air, together Christmas of 2009 and I do believe they had a new appreciation for my life after watching George Clooney’s character cope with his non-stop travel. My mother would have thought my job at DreamWorks was the perfect job and I wish she could have lived to see me achieve it. 

My mother was from Minnesota and my Dad from Pennsylvania. They met and married in California producing 4 girls in 5 years. Dad was an oil driller and my mom had been a bookkeeper prior to marriage. Money was tight with such a large family, but Mom never lost her dream to see the world. She talked my Dad into working overseas so we could eventually join him. When I was 3, we moved to Kirkuk, Iraq. In those days, companies housed their employees in compounds. Ours was quite large sporting 3 pools, a club house and movie theater which showed Westerns every Thursday.

It was a fantastic life. I do believe those 6 years were the best years of my mom’s life. We kind of had a millionaire’s existence on an oil driller’s salary. We had a Persian houseboy, Hassan, who was like a member of the family. There were parties at the clubs and lots of entertaining at each other’s houses. We met friends from all over the world that we have kept in touch with to this day. At the same time, we went through 2 revolutions, boarding school in England away from our parents for a year at a time and repatriation back home when the Iraqi government nationalized the oil industry and threw out all the foreigners.

We came back to the States, settled in Southern California and completed our schooling here.  We continued to travel. My Dad was working in Kuwait when I was in high school so I went over there during the summers. In college, Kathy studied in Germany and Donna in Spain. I graduated college and began my career. It afforded me some travel, but I did not travel as heavily as in my childhood until my job for DreamWorks. I feel grateful indeed to have had the experiences and opportunities I have had in my life and in my career and I thank both my parents for a great beginning.

I hope the readers will hear in the telling of my mother’s stories and the lessons I learned, the story they have in their own relationship with their mother… recognizing their mothers’ gifts to them and seeing their struggles in a new light.  After all, we are our mothers’ sons and daughters. There is no escaping it.  This book is designed to be “re-gifted”.  Read it, write in it, and give it to your own mom with gratitude.